Ralph is a sexually frustrated vampire who suffers from a peculiar curse. He's condemned for eternity to watch his one true love, Mona, be murdered by a pirate wielding a ham bone. But now? Now it's 1990, and Ralph is determined to break Mona's cycle of reincarnation. His first order of business is winning her affections, which he does by starting Rockula: a rock band that's sure to stake a claim on her heart.